


Breaking Records

by blackraspberryjam



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AKA I love the fertility of hobbits, F/M, Introducing the brood, fem!Bilbo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-25 12:04:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12035526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackraspberryjam/pseuds/blackraspberryjam
Summary: After the battle, everyone is excited to see their loved ones return to the mountain. They are especially intrigued about Bombur's wife, who he mentioned very rarely during the journey.They are certainly surprised when she turns out to have bare feet and no beard. They are even more surprised by who follows her.





	Breaking Records

When Erebor was finally secure, it was only a matter of time before the displaced dwarrow started flooding back into the gates. There were many tearful reunions as family and friends of the Company returned. Even those who had no relation to the other were often excited to see them, if only to match stories to faces.

Bofur’s friend Noirlu was happily welcomed, as many remembered tales around the fire of his drinking prowess and the time he and Bofur snuck a goat into Bombur’s room as children. Gloin’s wife was also a good face to put to a name, for even those who weren’t familiar with her seemed to have known her for eons after listening to Gloin prattle on.

The arrival of Dis was deeply celebrated, especially as the whole royal family was reunited. They may have ignored how bad of a scolding she gave Thorin but they were kind enough to hide her battleaxe lest there be a King Fili in the far too near future.

One of the people they were most excited to finally meet was Bombur’s wife. The cook was relatively shy about the whole thing and only bits and pieces were ever said. Bofur helped add some more to it sometimes, but he was reluctant to say much either. From what they knew, she was fairly short and had golden hair. Also that she cooked wonderfully, for that was one thing Bofur never shut up about.

There was also the understanding that they had children together, a few of them. That wasn’t discussed by anyone, however. To speak too much of how many children you had would lead to infertility or so was the superstition. Boasting too much of children was considered bad form generally, even if Gloin didn’t follow that rule. Most imagined Bombur was blessed with three or so. Four if the Company was particularly imaginative.

So, it was quite a surprise when his wife made it to the mountain with the fifth caravan of the year. Bombur had been waiting at the gate for it, as he had received ravens detailing the journey. As the caravan pulled into sight, much of the company assembled beside him, only missing the royal dwarves as they were unable to be pulled from their duties so easily.

There were several carts pulled into the mountain before Bombur, Bofur and Bifur ran out further, having spotted the right one. Inside it was a woman, perched at the driver's seat, holding the reins. She indeed had bright golden hair that shined in the sunlight, caught in a braid that circled her crown with another trailing down her back.

The surprising part was how her hairy feet were without shoes and the way her ears were pointed. She had no beard to speak of at all even. Even more surprising was the absolute brood of children she had in the back of her cart and the babe she had slung across her back. It seemed that she was in charge of the children of the caravan for the trip as a babysitter of a sort.

“This is my wife, Bel of the Shire.” Bombur introduced after having greeted her heartily. She had bright green eyes and a healthy smile. She greeted all of the company with smiles. It became fairly obvious that she was a Hobbit, being from the Shire.

“This is my youngest,” He said, gesturing to the child on her back. “Born while I was away.” He said, a tad unhappily. Understandably, of course. No one was happy to leave children behind.

The children of the cart lined up before the company, all with big smiles. That was when the company noticed they all had either the orange shade of Bombur’s hair or the golden locks of Bel. Then Bombur began going down the line.

“This is Burgo, my eldest.” He said, putting his hand on a young dwarfling’s shoulder (hobbitling?). He had the orange hair of his father and the starts of a fairly impressive beard, although he was still fairly young and only up to his father’s shoulder.

“The twins, Beryl and Balfur,” Bel helped, showing their next oldest daughter and son.

“Borrim.” Bombur continued with his son. 

“And Sapphire,” Bofur said, gesturing to another daughter.

“The other set of twins, Jade and Jasper.” 

“My boy, Bilur.”

“Emerald.” 

“Amber, Amethyst and Aquamarine,” Bel said. “Our triplets.”

“This is Pearl.” Bombur said, pulling one only a little younger out from where she was hiding behind her mother’s skirts.

“And of course, Ruby here,” Bel said of the babe on her back.

It was only had they had introduced the whole brood that they realized Oin and Ori had both clear fainted away and Balin looked not far behind.

“Fourteen children?” Dwalin asked with a slack jaw.

“No wonder you wouldn’t say anything,” Dori muttered.

“We’re working to break an old Shire record.” Bel laughed. “My grandfather had twelve, but the record stands at sixteen.”

It became a long-standing rule that no one talked about exactly how many fainted at the gates of Erebor that day. No matter if they did it publicly. There was still much talk about when they told Fili and Kili who about keeled over when they saw Bombur and Bel and their brood marching through Erebor. It was much worse when the news that Bel was pregnant again came about.

(They did end up beating the record very soundly.)

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I *really* love the concept of Bombur's many, many children being because of Hobbit fertility. In any form really, whether that be before or after Erebor or with any Hobbit, I just love the concept.
> 
> I imagine it's quite the source of gossip with the low birth rates and lessened rate of daughters. Imagine dwarves being proud of their two-three kids and Bombur waltzes in with his army of children.
> 
> This is mostly a for-fun short little thing but I hope you enjoyed it.


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